When your divorce is caused by infidelity, it can be even more painful. Not only are you dealing with anger issues and stress from breaking up your family, but you have the pain of knowing your spouse was not faithful to you. If you were the one who was cheating, you have to deal with the guilt from causing the breakup.
Another adultery is not the leading cause of divorce, it is certainly one of the main reasons couples split up. In most states, adultery has little effect on the divorce settlement, but you should be aware that it is possible. If you and your spouse cannot agree on a settlement and you need to rely on a judge to settle your divorce, your settlement could be effected.
If adultery was the cause of the divorce, and it is stated in the divorce papers as the reason, some judges may be more likely to give the faithful spouse more in the settlement. The judge may not even realize he/she is doing it for that reason, but if they have been cheated on in the past, they may feel sorry for the faithful spouse. That is a chance you have to take when letting a judge decide your future – whether they want to admit it or not, their personal beliefs can play a part in the settlement.
If one of you cheated many years ago and were forgiven, adultery cannot be used as the reason for your divorce now. You may still feel cheated, but if you have continued to live with your spouse, no judge will accept that adultery is the cause now. The judge may even believe you are only saying you were cheated on as a way to gain sympathy.
Your alimony payments will be determined by how long you were married, how much each of you makes now and whether one spouse needs to be supported while they learn a new skill or find a new job. Why the divorce happened is not usually a concern, but remember, if you don’t write your own settlement, you are taking a chance that the judge will not care about the infidelity. Talk to your lawyer about your concerns.
If you are currently involved in a divorce and require legal guidance, before you spend thousands of dollars in legal fees, check out our ebook “What Your Divorce Attorney Probably Won’t Tell You.” This ebook details the things your divorce lawyer is likely to never tell you – the strategies, plans and attitudes you must adopt while filing for a divorce and the information you must amass in order to make educated decisions. Grab your copy here.