Preparing for Divorce – Tips for Women

Divorce is a difficult and emotional time for everyone involved, but it can be made easier by following several tips and being prepared for what lies ahead in the coming weeks and months until the divorce is finalized.  If you have already decided to divorce, then these are some of the steps that you will need to take, sooner rather than later.

Speak to an experienced divorce lawyer.  The issues regarding divorce and settlements can be extremely complex, and are best handled by a professional.  You don’t necessarily need to go with the first lawyer you speak to – feel free to discuss the case with several and choose the one you think will be best for you.  Experience should play a part in your decision, but you should also choose someone you feel you can discuss the issues with comfortably.

  • If you need emotional support, then don’t be afraid to seek this out.  There is nothing to be embarrassed about if you feel you would benefit from speaking to a therapist, and it is something that many people, men and women alike, will do during a divorce.  Speaking to someone can help you to deal more effectively with the issues and emotions that you are experiencing.

  • Open a post office box and have all of your mail directed here.  This is even more important if you and your ex are still sharing a house, because you need to ensure that your mail is kept confidential.  It may include paperwork from your lawyer that he should not see.

  • Set up a new email account of your own, and choose a password that he will not be able to guess.  Use this email for all of your personal communication from this point onwards – if you were previously sharing an email account, remember that he will also be able to read anything on here.  Remember, also, to log out completely after you check your mail, and close the browser when you have finished.

  • Open your own bank account.  If you have been using joint accounts for the duration of your marriage, then it is important for you to now set up your own, separate finances.  Ensure that all of your income is paid into this new account, and also put aside any money you can afford each month.  This will be needed in order to pay your lawyer.

  • Start building your own credit history.  The easiest way to do this is to apply for a credit card in your own name, and use it when you are making your regular purchases.  Pay off the card in full each month, so that you don’t get into debt with it, and don’t be tempted to buy things that you know you cannot afford.  This will build up a credit history that is not linked to that of your husband.

There are many other things that you should do in order to prepare for divorce, and these are just a few to get you started.

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