Ask any couple out there on the verge of divorce and they’ll tell you that they want nothing more than a civil, quick divorce settled after mature talk and grown up discussion. However, it is not long after that they start talking that the ugly feelings and differences rear head and furious debates begin. Whether it is blaming your ex for all the pointless bickering or fighting over money – finding common ground during a split can turn out to be challenging.
But is it impossible to sit down, have a talk and come out on the other side on friendly terms?
No, it isn’t.
Hundreds of couple everyday settle their differences mutually and avoid spending a bulk load of cash in court proceedings. A friendly and quick divorce is indeed possible – you just need to have a handle on the situation with a positive and neutral stance.
Lower Your Expectations
This is the number one rule of getting through a divorce without damaging your personality along the way. A divorce is a gradual process, and not a one-time thing that you can settle on your own terms. Don’t expect everything to go your way or as you planned – be open to the prospect of negotiations and settle things in a way that it works out in the favor of both you and our children
Look for Mutual Happiness
Sometimes you have got to set aside your own preferences and take a decision for your kids’ future. Put your children first and take a look at the situation from their point of view. Seeing parents fight and split is not an easy time for a child and can have permanent impact on their personality. Remember, it is not their fault that you two couldn’t make it work and they don’t deserve to go through the misery and pain of it all. Keep your children out of the mess and talk to them with an open and friendly approach so they can process the situation at their own pace. With a friendly and quick divorce your children at least have the comfort of knowing that their parents may have divorced each other but they both are still there for them.
Find Common Ground
The blame games aren’t going to get you anywhere. Try and find a neutral ground so you can save each other a lot of time, money and hassle. Never hesitate in getting professional assistance as it can solve a lot of problems and end a lot of discussions on a positive note.
Act like Grown Ups
Don’t let the feeling of revenge swallow you whole. A lot of couples tend to act like children when it comes to money matters and splitting of assets. While the feeling of being wronged will indeed make you furious, shouting and anger won’t get you much farther. Stay civil and decide on the situation like adults.
Reminisce the Good Times
At the end of the day, don’t let things go ugly to a point from where there is no turning back. Remember all the good times you’ve spent together and all the beautiful memories you’ve had, and don’t destroy your past in a way that it haunts your future as well. Giving up to rage and exchanging hurtful words will hurt you too, so avoid getting bitter as much as you can.
You don’t have to be friends with your spouse to have a friendly and quick divorce. Don’t throw away years worth of love and compassion in your anger – consider divorce mediation today to get a quick divorce.