Divorce is a painful process. Even people who have been unhappy for years are surprised that they still feel sadness that their marriage has ended. If there is a lot of anger in the marriage, it may take months for the sadness to appear, but it usually does. Even if you were the one who filed for divorce, don’t be surprised if you feel grief months later.
Everyone deals with divorce differently. Some people go wild with partying or dating, while others retreat to their homes and fight depression. You will have to learn to deal with your divorce in the best way for you, but we do have a few tips to help you through this tough time in your life.
- Make new friends. Often, when a couple divorces, their friends seem to divorce, too, and take sides. It may not be on purpose, but it does happen. You need to get out and make new friends. Join a book club, go to church, attend local events – anywhere that you may meet people with the same likes as you have.
- Deal with the anxiety. You can’t wish away the anxiety and stress of a divorce. Strong people are the ones who can admit they need help and go find it. Whether you choose to go to counseling or ask your doctor for medication to help is up to you. You can also deal with anxiety by exercising, making sure you get enough sleep, eating right and doing things you enjoy.
- Don’t let anyone tell you how to feel. This is very important as everyone will have an opinion on how you should be “over” the divorce by a certain time. Only you know how you feel – don’t let others make you feel guilty if you aren’t as “healed” as they think you should be. Often, this isn’t on purpose as your friends and family just want to see you happy, but you still have the right to say you don’t want to go out or that you want to be alone.
- Have some fun. Whether this fun is playing hide and seek with your children or going to a concert with friends is up to you. Everyone has their own idea of what is fun – do what you like, not what others tell you to do.
Above all else, give yourself time to grieve your marriage and begin to heal. For some people, it takes a few years, so don’t rush it. If you truly feel depressed and can’t shake the down feeling, be sure to talk to your doctor as soon as possible. Healing is a different process for everyone and you need to choose to best options for you.
If you are currently involved in a divorce and require legal guidance, before you spend thousands of dollars in legal fees, check out our ebook “What Your Divorce Attorney Probably Won’t Tell You.” This ebook details the things your divorce lawyer is likely to never tell you – the strategies, plans and attitudes you must adopt while filing for a divorce and the information you must amass in order to make educated decisions. Grab your copy here.