Why Should I Hire a Mediator for my Divorce?

When some people file for divorce, all they can think of is “sticking it” to their spouse.  This is completely understandable – and the best way to get a divorce, if you want to fight for months in court and pay thousands of dollars in lawyer fees!  Stop and think about that before you refuse to compromise with anything your spouse offers.

If you want an easier, cheaper and quicker divorce, you need to file an amicable divorce.  This means you and your spouse work together to create a divorce settlement that is satisfactory to both of you.  Once you have your agreement, you can even file it without hiring a lawyer, if you want, but this is not recommended.  Your family law attorney knows the laws better than you do and can make sure you haven’t forgotten anything in the agreement.


Compromising with your spouse may not be possible without professional help.  Hiring a mediator can allow you and your spouse to still file that amicable divorce, even if you can’t be in the same room.  A mediator is someone who has been specifically trained in mediation – or how to help couples find a middle ground that they are both happy with.

Your mediator will listen to each spouse and take notes on what obstacles are preventing you from agreeing with your spouse.  Then, he/she will talk to each party and make sure that they understand exactly what the other spouse wants.  Sometimes, we get so wrapped up in our emotions that we truly don’t hear what is being said.  You may find that, by using a mediator, you and your spouse aren’t that far apart on your agreement, but you are so angry, you don’t really listen.

The mediator will offer suggestions to help you and your spouse create your divorce settlement.  These are not orders – only ideas that can help you design your agreement without going to court.  Your mediator knows how the courts in your area work and their suggestions will reflect this.  If you choose not to use the mediator’s suggestions, be aware that if you go to court, these suggestions could become orders and you will have no choice but to follow the judge’s decision.

Hiring a mediator can help you file the amicable divorce you want.  Using a mediator can speed up the process and save you money because your divorce will be final sooner.  If you can’t compromise with your spouse, find a mediator to help you with your settlement.

If you are currently involved in a divorce and require legal guidance, before you spend thousands of dollars in legal fees, check out our free 7-Day “Divorce 101” course.  Sign up below and you’ll immediately start receiving tips and guidance you can use to minimize the pain and time required to get through the divorce process.

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